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The Challenges of Social Distancing In Short Hills

By Anusha Veluri |

Short Hills is a fairly affluent neighborhood, to say the least. According to an analysis of Time magazine in 2014, Short Hills is the wealthiest community in the United States. According to Forbes magazine, the median income in Short Hills is $229,222. Wow, nice job, Short Hills!

Well, in a town like that, you would think that staying inside would be as easy as cake! But according to many residents, you would be wrong. It's excruciatingly painful, and it is apparently so difficult to cope with the new rules! Here are some problems that Short Hillers have encountered over the past two weeks.

One concern that residents had is the closing of schools. Many parents were left thinking, "The kids, they're going to be, like, near me?" Marissa Wright, mother of three, said. "I can't believe they have to stay home. With me. It's too much, all at once. I mean, where do I put them? What do they even do?" Over the span of last week, many teachers have received emails from worried parents with questions. Third grade teacher Mrs. Johnson received this email from one of her students' mother, "What do I say to my kids? Do I say anything at all? What are they like? I'm so nervous omg! #Awkward!"

Hopefully she and her children were able to hit it off!

Another concern that residents had, was regarding their inability to go to the gym. "The governor wants to tell me that I can't go to my pilates class? He wants to tell me that I can't go? Who does he think he is?" So true, Karen. Sorry about that.

Finally, some residents are worried about being cooped up in their houses. John Sweeney, 36 year old father of 1, said, "It's very hard, being in such a big home. It's so easy to get lost. Sometimes I leave little objects on the floor to remember how to get back. So confusing."

It's okay, John! 71% of Short Hills residents do claim to get lost in their homes "at least thrice a week." You are not alone in your struggle.

In fact, none of you are! Clearly, it is so hard to be rich. Hopefully things get better for all of Short Hills after this pandemic passes. What doesn't kill you makes you stronger!

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